I’m okay

Hi there! It’s been quite sometime since my last post, and what motivated me to write today? May be I am a little ‘less occupied’ with studies since the semesters just got over. Or maybe I want to pen down something that I realised very recently.

These days I have been complaining a lot about the approaching winter and my chapped lips and not being able to wake up early and feeling low and lonely. I am not sad but then I’m not happy either. There are so many things to do yet I am being a slouchy bear! My dear ones convince me by saying, “you have your life so perfect ,well served in a plate. Probably that’s why you are complaining.” At one point even I began thinking -“Am I exaggerating things just to spice up my days a little?” But no one would skip meals (unknowingly) or bath(knowingly) for an entire day just for the sake of drama.

What do I do now?I have been a follower of Robin Sharma and his self help book ‘Who will cry when you die’. I opened that book once again. Read it till I found out what to do. Took a piece of paper and jotted down exactly what was going on in my head. And believe me it brought a lot of clarity and discipline to my thoughts. I felt much better. Next day I woke up early, took a walk under the sun, had bath, wore something nice and made coffee and french toast- all as instructed by my go-to-friend.

So what did I realise? That it’s okay not to be OK sometimes. That problems seem to vanish when you write them down. That you don’t need someone or something to be happy in life. Indeed happiness comes from within.Now don’t tell me you have never ever felt sad without a reason! We all do. And it’s okay. Accept the fact and observe your thoughts. Do something you love and let the time surpass until you feel better again.

Okay, now back to question number one! I got motivated to write from today’s word prompt ‘enchanted‘ but no I’m not enchanted(like the dictionary says) but yes I’m happy and I’m okay. Thanks.

Happy ending

9.10.2019….A palindrome day is special itself. But for me it’s a day to be remembered throughout my life. I had a subtle desire for adventure water sports and hence River rafting was something I wanted to do.

I have always believed in “God only makes happy endings. If it’s not happy it’s not the end.” and thank God I have never been proved otherwise.

At 7 in the morning we checked out from our hotel to Bagdugra airport. The driver made the journey enjoyable by playing soothing music and telling us stories – about food, politics, travelling and lot more. But I, like a child not paying much attention to the discussion, opened the car window, allowed the fresh cool breeze to veil my face and soaked in some more of the mesmerising beauty of Sikkim for one last time. I was sad for I was leaving a place that was not mine but a place that synthesised a new found love for hill station, a place which could capture my heart in just four days.

Twist was when the driver asked my dad, “saab ji, kabhi river rafting kiye ho? “(sir, have you ever done river rafting) to which he replied “nahi, par meri beti ko bohot mann hain”(no, but my daughter wishes for). I couldn’t believe my ears and looked at my dad. He winked and said ‘I know! ‘ Then what? The driver took us to the concerned place, we booked an inflatable raft, wore life jackets and all set for river rafting!

I could feel the adrenaline rush in me, appreciating each moment of being closer to something I skeptically added to my bucket list.

One side was Sikkim and the other was West Bengal and in the middle flowed River Tista. Upon her we too flowed. She was innocent, playful and mischievous… All at the same time.

When the water splashed my face for the first time, there was a sense of excitement mixed with fright. I hold my mom tight and asked dad if everything was all right. Deep down I knew, they were into it only for me.

My dad is 62 and mom is 54. Adventure sports at this age is simply commendable! To enjoy life to the fullest is what I have inherited from my dad and to not give up till the last breath, from my mom. ‘Thank you’ would be an understatement to what they have done for me- fulfilling my wish that I didn’t even express was an instant! Hence I said them that I love them, forever and always…

I have seen people rafting in the Amazon river in TV and thought.. Some day I too will do it. And for me it was no less than Amazon! I felt blessed that that someday came so soon. Indeed I was the happiest on earth that day.

I have to acknowledge the guides that went with us, they were three -all smiling and cheering us throughout that 4 km journey. They did all the technical things required, made us enjoy the enthralling times comfortably.

There was fear in my heart, a kind of apprehension… What if anyone of us fell down the raft? What if Tista took us far far away? But the joy and amazement could suppress all other feelings.

We did it and returned safe -all drenched in water and happiness!

The sincerity and hospitality of the people were remarkable.

And the green apple cheese cake and mango shake could impress the sweet tooth quite well!

The four day sojourn came to an end. And yes it was a happy ending!

Sojourn

#Sikkim

Just 20 days prior to yesterday, my travel buddies took a trip to Singapore and Malaysia. Hence I was a little surprised when they asked me “Dona, we are up for an adventure trip this time. Wanna join? ” What was my answer is quite relevant from the three boarding passes that my hand bag holds. And also the string of pictures that followed!

From guwahati to Bagdugra(by air)

Bagdugra to Gangtok (by road)

River Tipsa and her beauty.

Homely stay at Hotel Keepsa

Keepsa and in and around…

This cute little shop had everything, right from my grey cardigan to my favorite coffee!

The journey begins.

The Tsomgo Lake.

Meet my parents -my travel buddies!

Let’s go.

Enchanting view from the rope way

Enchanting view after the rope way.

Wanna take a ride?

Smile of a nature lover!

And then a wrap up in the M. G. Marg.

Sometimes mornings can be so rewarding!

Flower show.

Beautiful.

View from Hanuman Tok.

Ganesh tok.

Tashi view point.

Gomjang monastery.

Banjakhri waterfalls

Namchi, Chardham.

Broken but Beautiful

I have never done a movie /book /series review before and honestly speaking, even now I don’t know the nitty-gritty of this art. But the heart wants what it wants! Let’s give it a try… Hence, presenting before you a wonderful experience of watching eleven episodes of an appealing web series called Broken but beautiful(season 1).
A girl named Sameera aka Sam and her tempestuous mind which could never let go of a relationship which was declared to be over by the other person almost a year ago. In between the vague attempts that she made to give it an ‘ultimate’ closure, fate struck by a widower Veer who lost his wife three years back but talks to her in hallucination. A string of events happen(watch it to know it) and we get to see that Veer and Sameera develops feelings for each other during the journey of their personal turbulence.
It’s not the budding romance between the two that striked me, rather it was their individual efforts to get out of their own chaos.
Sameera was after some Kartik who clearly said ‘ I don’t love you any more ‘ but she wasn’t ready to believe what she heard and naively waited for him to act such that it might prove otherwise. She waited for him to wish on her birthday, she even called him up when she genuinely got caught in some trouble, desperately watched the phone screen to blink his name but no calls, no texts, no love , no care, nothing! Then she decided that finally she should close this toxic relationship and move on but hey no! How could she stop thinking about, talking about, dreaming about, hoping about him? It was not possible for her to end what was so close to her heart. Never.
She lost all her self esteem and ran after him only to realise that it didn’t even bother him slightly. She saw herself broken into thousand pieces but held them together in front of him pleading him to get back with her. The never ending cycle continued until one fine day she realised that all the while what she thought love was a mere attraction turned addiction, that she felt nothing, absolutely nothing for him, that all the moments that she cherished was actually a mistake!
The best part of the series was the raw and real emotions depicted by all the characters, so well so that you will definitely find a part of yourself in it. Indeed… Everyone deserves a second chance! So does your heart-to fall in love with the right one, the one who will accept your broken pieces and mend your soul once and for all…that’s all… Broken but Beautiful!

Essentially emotional

If you ask me to add an adjective in front of my name, I would deliberately (and proudly and happily) suggest the word ’emotional ‘. This term itself covers a broad spectrum. If for one it’s like feeling a strange ache after reading a tragedy, for someone else it may be crying out ten days straight after reading the same! I have always believed that I am a keen eyed person when it comes to knowing the emotional status of my close ones. I may not be absolutely accurate but my idea usually never goes wrong and more than that I have always found people opening up to me about their problems. The best part of this whole thing is that I am bestowed upon immense trust and belief when they do so -the reason why I wanted to take up psychology had it not been medicine.
During an emotional breakdown a person is in dire need of mental support and your words can work like magic (both formal and informal counselling). Life gets dicey sometimes and balancing the personal, professional, social and emotional aspects becomes difficult and at those times when your ‘everything will be fine ‘ or ‘ I am there with you ‘ brings some solace to the concerned person and you are rewarded with “in today’s world no one does this. Shivangi, you are different from other people! “…that’s when you realize being emotional isn’t that bad! It’s when you understand someone’s suffering and try to heal it as if it was your own. It’s when you lend a helping hand and a smile assuring “time heals all wounds. “Being emotional is never a weakness. Rather it’s your strength to make your dear ones stronger.
I am Shivangi priyadarshini and yes I am Emotional.

I write, they judge

You keep saying that I should write.
That I should pour out words from my heart.
To let you peep through my treasure of emotions.
To take you to an adventure ride.
To places where I have nothing to hide.
But I fear about things that I hear.
‘She might be depressed about something or someone ‘, ‘heart broken may be ‘ or ‘something terrible has happened to her. ‘
To spill a tinge of pain in poetry is an art.
To write about small but intriguing things is how you start.
Who else will make you relish the moments of yesterday if not me?
Who else will let you feel life is beautiful if not me?
When I first held the wings of a butterfly,
I got my fingers printed with her colours.
When he first talked to me that night
His words got imprinted in my heart.
Confessions were sweet. He was sweeter.
Miles away we were but our phones kept us together.
What would have happened if those three magical words left unexpressed?
What wouldn’t have rather, I wonder.
To endlessly go on writing about what’s in my mind is sometimes a risk.
Because at the end of the day
I write and they judge.